Tiger

I know I get to meet a lot of people living in Tokyo, but it’s not everyday that a man as devilish as this one walks into your life. Meet Steve, my hottest and most lethal new ally. I knew he was trouble from day one. I spotted the glint in his eye from a mile off but it wasn’t until we had our first bender together that we formed the ultimate union. It started as any normal night might when two people pleasantly stumble upon Happy Hour and ended in what has come to be known as our own signature brand of chaos. For future reference, when they name a cocktail “Tarantula” it is to be respected. It should be sipped and enjoyed at a leisurely pace before starting on the next one, for it is a wild beast with devastating consequences that can not be tamed. Under no circumstances should one taunt it and if you are silly enough to challenge it, it is best to have at least one very large man present who can carry you home. You will also need a stellar companion to fill in the blanks the next morning. Since that fateful night we haven’t looked back. A diabolical fusion of cheek, wit and charm, we frame a tenacious team and a force to be reckoned with. Whether it’s happy hour at the pub, nomihodai at an izakaya or a bit of late night classic karaoke, the night is guaranteed to prove pandemonium when you have an accomplice as sinful as Steve.

I'll do it tomorrow.

It seems a tad ironic that I can get off my arse to write a blog about the fact that I am incredibly lazy but not about the any of the interesting things I have done recently. I think they call it procrastination. Right now I am sitting, ok that's a lie – lying in my room that has developed a certain odour I can’t quite place my finger on. If I was to hazard a guess I’d say it’s a delicate blend of essence of “spent beer bottles” scattered with “growing pile of unwashed clothes in the corner” and a distinct base note of “manky, mouldy futon I should have hung out on the weekend” then there is the pleasant stench of stale perfume I am literally carrying around with me ever since my bottle of Irresistible by Givenchy spilt all through my handbag.

I still haven’t fully unpacked my suitcase from the holiday I went on a month ago. I can’t find the 3rd DVD from the boxed set of season one of “Friends” in the rubble to give back to my boyfriend. I am hoping to learn fluent Japanese via osmosis from the textbook’s sprawled through my bed, which incidentally really needs it’s sheets washed, I keep finding un-popped kernels of the popcorn I had for dinner three nights ago. I am also performing a strategic balancing act with the pile of random items on my dresser. It’s kind of like those games at the arcade where you throw in 10-cent coins in order to push the other coins off and claim your prize. My last score was a crusty Easter egg well past its expiry date but there is always tomorrow.

I’m not exactly sure why I am listing my achievements in filth, I guess now its written in print I can conduct a full analysis before I eventually act or am forced to deal with a mutant cockroach infestation I am quite possibly sponsoring. In any event, it’s best not to rush into things. It’s getting late I should probably find my bed and get some sleep.

Happy Birthday Sandy

It really doesn’t feel like a year since we last celebrated Sandy’s birthday in the smallest pub in Tokyo with a bunch of random old men, but apparently it has been. This year she rudely went on a trip to New York for her birthday so we had to wait for her return to go for dinner and drinks at our new favourite bar down the road from our house. We did it Japanese style on tatami mats, drinking Sho-chu and lemon tea. We had adult conversations about the complexities of tea ceremonies and discussed social issues and current events, it almost felt like we were grown ups. It was a lovely evening with good food and the best company in the world. Love you Sand, Happy Birthday!

Einen OKINAWA-en

Last week four hot girls took some well-deserved time off and went on a little beach holiday to a small Japanese island called Okinawa. Our plan involved 2 things, cocktails and beach the rest was optional. We managed to fit in a spot of snorkelling and multiple rides on a banana boat pulled by a jet-ski. Naomi spontaneously acquired the ability to sprechen Sie Deutsches and for the first time ever we had our name on a sign waiting for us at the airport. Because I am the laziest person in the world and I’m on my way to meet a mate for a drink, I’ll cut this short. Here are some pics to brighten your day, you’ll notice there are none of me in my swimmers, they were all mysteriously destroyed but it was an amazing 4 days and so refreshing to get out of Tokyo for a while. Loves et.