Shit. Not her again

Last night it was summer party night at my favourite izakaya in Shizu. It’s my favourite not because they serve raw whale and raw horsemeat but because they let me do whatever I want there. They speak no English at all so I usually get away with stuff with a blank stare while they talk at me in Japanese. Last night I had my new second best friend there to translate for me. She said that they remember me and my antics very well, and that they were aware that I stole one of their hello kitty dolls on my last visit. I reassured them that she has a good home now and that we had given her a new identity. Her friends now refer to her as Michelle and when she is old enough to ask where she came from then I will take her back for a visit. Summer party night rocked. Their first mistake was to offer $15 all you drink and all you can eat Sashimi. Their second mistake was to decorate outside the entrance with an inflatable baby pool and water bombs. As people were leaving the pub they would giggle at the display and pretend they were going to throw one. I think the water bombs were meant for outside, but we were inside, so I brought one in and aimed up a couple in the corner but Chris caught me and diverted my attention to him. My aim was perfect. I hit him directly between the eyes and soaked him. If you were in a pub in Australia and you threw a water bomb at someone they wouldn’t ask any questions, they would just kick you out. Not Japan. Instead of “get that idiot out of here”, the staff immediately produced a bunch of towels and proceeded to dry Chris down. Then they gave me a present for my efforts – my own little water bomb kit.

Last night I also managed to try out my new line. When I hear the negative response to my old pick up line “Do you understand English?” I now know “Do you want me to teach you English?” It’s perfect for a gaijin girl like myself. Both of these stellar lines failed last night on the cute waiter, I had to go one step further and ask “can you teach me Japanese” to which he replied “anata wa nihongo ga joozu desu" (your Japanese is already good). Bugger et.